A few weeks ago, my site coordinator, Krista, asked me if I would be willing to house-sit as her family is out of town this weekend, to feed the cat and let the dog out. She promised that I would get yummy snack foods in the fridge and full access to their tv and internet (faster and more reliable than ours!) and a dishwasher so of course I couldn't turn that down. And it turned out to be very timely, as I desperately needed some time away to reflect and think and just rest this weekend.And it was very productive for the first little while, as I wrote this blog post
, did a lot of thinking, wrote some emails, and just did some things I needed to do.
But then, a few hours into a stretch of a couple of days spent alone, I started to get lonely. The peace of Christ left me as the devil came in and said "You're such a loser, sitting here all alone. Where are your friends?" And suddenly everything bad about my life seemed to be multiplied times a thousand, every doubt was magnified, and the dark and cold outside seemed overwhelming.
After some time wallowing in the negativity, I did what I know to do when I can't take it any more. I created. I had brought along some art supplies just in case I needed to make something, because it truly is the best way for me to think sometimes. So I turned on my worship music and began to paint with bright, happy watercolors and suddenly the image began to appear.
Today is a new day, and I'm braving the outdoors because I saw on twitter that the sermon at church this morning is about fear, which is one of my biggest struggles, so I know I have to go. Today I am living into that promise, that God will never leave me, He will never fail me, and never abandon me. He is on my side. And I'm not letting the devil in.
How do you deal with discouraging thoughts?